The real problem

Placing your real name on these forums could lead to people looking you up, Googling you. Outrage!!! You grab your pitchforks and key boards determined to end this evil corporate behavior with well thought out forum posts. It doesn’t work, the changes take effect. At first you resist, but no one seems to be prophesying the inevitable rise of the next OP class. Frustrated, you decide the risks must be ventured to warn the other. You thoroughly blast Rogues with irrefutable statistics and data proving them OP and you victorious internet champion of the day, job well done. Hey, you think, that wasn’t too bad, no one crashed through my door with a machine gun, 10,000 pizzas have not been delivered to my house, and maybe this is the next logical step in social gaming.

You let your guard down; you get used to the idea, even accept and embrace it. Then you start Googling around at some of your favorite forum posters, guild mates, friends, etc. and notice a horrible, horrible pattern. They are all horrendously ugly, most are less that a 5 on a Likert scale of beauty from 1 to 10!!! Oh no, you convince yourself, surely I am not as ugly as they, for I am champion of the internet. I am one of those rare and elusive beautiful WoW players. But there it is, you’ve judged the company you keep and discovered a misfit crew of uglies.

Constantly gnawing at the back of your mind, you stare for hours and hours into the mirror, trying to see the beauty that you once saw. But it is no longer there, you cannot shake the feeling that you belong right alongside the uglies. No longer champion of the internet you accept your fate, stop bathing, decide Cheetos and Mountain Dew are sufficient meals, lose your job and family. You rarely are seen outside now, people talk about you in the past tense, like you are already dead. All the while, you are in your parent’s basement, wondering where that once beautiful hero of Azeroth has gone.

/Shake fist towards the sky

Wwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeee?