Is Real ID auto-Enabled and if it is...

Q u o t e:
How the heck do i turn it off?

In order for two players to become Real ID friends, both players will need to add the other as a Real ID friend. To add another player as a Real ID friend, the player's full name and email address must be known. If two players do not mutually add each other as Real ID friends, neither will appear on the other's Real ID friends list.

Due to this functionality, you can opt-out of the additional features by simply refraining from adding another player as a Real ID friend. You can also turn off Real ID friend requests, which will disable message prompts whenever another player adds you as a Real ID friend:

To turn off Real ID friend requests, follow these quick steps:

Hit "Esc" to bring up the Options menu.
From there, click on "Interface" and then on "Battle.net."
Uncheck "Real ID Friend Requests."

More information on Real ID can be found here: http://us.battle.net/realid/faq.html